This tale took place not on the 4th line, it took place on a street, in the little white house we used to live in. The little white house that became too small for our growing family. Fun times happened on the street and street tales need to be told too.
Ah.... darling C. So many things can be said about C, my endearing high school daughter. Nice things can be said, not so nice things can be said, but for today I'm going to stick to the laughable things that can be said about C. For a long time, she did not find this so humorous, but I beg to differ, it's funny, it's become a bit of an inside joke for my family and I'm going to let you all in on it. Jokes are much more fun when everybody is in on them!
Cue the going back in time music, the wavy coloured lines, because I'm going to take you back a few years, five years to precise, when C was just a wee girl, on the edge of teenage hood and when of course she knew it all.
Now just for arguments sake, I'm going to say that this occurrence happened on a Wednesday evening. I can't really remember the exact day, but Wednesday is in the middle of the week, so I feel as if Wednesday is a friendlier day, not quite the start of the week, not quite the end, but a good well rounded day. To make the picture a little bit more clear for all, I had a baby boy, a brand spanking new baby boy, the first of two boys. I'll save that story for another day. Which means I still had control over the TV. See? I can pretty much incorporate TV into any situation or have anything happen and relate it to a show on TV, usually I can bring it back to a Seinfeld episode, or an old Simpson episode, even the Flintstones. You get the point and I'll get back to my point.
The TV show Jeopardy was. The game show, where Alex Trebek is the host and the player needs to answer in a form of a question, there are different categories to pick from and if you are studious and quick to buzz in you can win big money!!!!
Category.......? "Books of the Bible for $400 please Alex."
I can't quite remember what the question was, but the answer was a book of the bible. Now, having grown up going to a Christian school and going to church, I am pretty confident in my books of the bible. I one point in my life I had the old and new testament memorised, not well, the end of the old testament always throws me off, lots of big names ending in "iah" and then the odd little name thrown in like Joel, and Amos to mix up a bit. The new testament, once again it's the end, lots of first and seconds and sometimes a third apostle and lots books ending "ions". Confusing, but....I know where the books are in the bible, I don't have to spend a lot of time rifling through the pages to get to what I want, in that regards I am confident I know the books of bible.
"Books of the Bible for $400 please Alex." Before I even had a chance to open my mouth, let's remember....a brand new baby was in my arms and I was bit slow on the draw due to lack of sleep, I was about to give the answer....when Charlotte shouted out, "The book of Judith!!!"
I almost dropped the new baby out of arms. "The book of Judith? There's no book in the bible called Judith."
"Oh yes there is." That response came from C complete with a knowing head bob and arms crossed in front of her.
This is the part where I got all up her in face with a sleeping baby in my arms trying to do that yelling/whispering voice because I'm super tired because I just had a baby and someone is trying to tell me that I'm wrong. Well, I was having none of that. "And pray tell, where do you find this book in the bible, is it in the old or new testament, because I'm telling you, in all my years of memorising bible books, never once did I come across the book of Judith."
"There is so a book of the bible called Judith."
"You go find your bible and you go show me the book of Judith, and if you find it I will read the book of Judith, because I am interested in what Judith has to say to me." I did my own attitude head bob with that statement.
Off she went to her room. I heard drawers opening and closing, papers being rustled around, opening and shutting of closet doors and then, quiet in her room. The bible had been located. I heard pages being flipped back and forth and then a quiet, "ohhhhhh." She emerged from her room, bible in hand.
"It's Jude."
"Pardon me? What did you say? Did you say there is no book in bible named Judith? It's Jude? Who was right? Oh me? That's right, I told you so. Here's your lesson C, never play against me in basic bible trivia, I will win. You are forgetting that I had years of Christian schooling, going to church, not once, but twice on Sunday, years of Calvinettes, and years of dreaded catechism."
No, I wasn't a gracious winner, but it was her head bobbing attitude with her teenage ways, that brought out the mother angst in me.
That's the family joke. We joke that if C ever teaches Sunday School, is she teaching from the book of Judith? We joke that when it's time for her to do profession of faith in church, we hope she selects a passage from the book of Judith to read out loud for all to hear. When she gets married, we joke that her wedding scripture will be from the book of Judith, because from what we understand, that Judith is a wise and wonderful woman, much like C's mom.
From the 4th line,
Arlene
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